I spent the day wandering, doing nothing, thinking not much and now I find myself sat at a computer at 3AM listening to music on as low a volume I can before it’s muffled from the sounds of my fan being overworked in the tremendous heat. The thought crossed my mind that if that fan broke, I would burn.
And that’s not hyperbole. The amount of heat my computer pumps out it’s suprising I haven’t got boils over my hands already. If the fan broke my options would be burn a slow and painful death, or turn off the computer. Neither is acceptable.
Secret option number 3 is glue. I could repair the fan. I could do that, right? I’ve fixed phones before. I’ve glued my watch back together. I’ve saved laptops with a bit of pritt stick. I even managed to repair a car with a dobble of blue tac, once. (granted, it was only the ciggerette lighter cap, but fuckoffanddie).
On closer inspection, pouring glue on a machine whose primary function is to spin is probably not the best idea. Bit like putting an olympic athelete in a mermaid costume – great for a bit of night time cos-play but it aint winning any awards for it’s job.
…Did I just imply i’m slightly aroused by fans covered in glue…? Ignore that.
So glue on a fan was a bad idea, but it’s broken how to fix it. Second idea is, ofcourse, the screwdriver/hammer technique. Which in the case of my fragile repair skill is mostly hammer. I fear this, too, will cause more trouble than it stunts. But, if it wasn’t 3AM I’d probably stand a chance…
Alas, it is the early hours, and if the lovely rotating blades to my left do decide to stop, I’ll be fried harder than an omelette. I’ll be grilled harder than a terrorist in a cell with no cameras. I’ll be microwaved harder than the overdone rustlers burger I had for dessert last night. Right now, I am bread. Without that fan, I’m toast.
Someone pass the butter.
